Last Updated on October 22, 2023 by cmv

Understanding Relationship Triggers

Have you ever found yourself in an argument with your partner that quickly escalates? Triggers often play a significant role in such situations. But what exactly are triggers?

Triggers are emotional responses that surface during conflicts and are often rooted in unresolved stories from our past. These enduring vulnerabilities can be traced back to arguments with parents, siblings, friends, ex-partners, or other significant relationships. They can also manifest as recurring patterns from previous experiences, unconsciously influencing our present lives.

For example, imagine having a parent who constantly criticized your grades, making you feel inadequate even if you brought home an A-. As a result, you may have developed a fear of disappointing others and harbored a sense of not being “good enough.” Fast forward to the present, when your partner criticizes you, and you immediately become defensive and angry. You may stop listening, counter-criticize them, or deflect blame onto their shortcomings. This could be a trigger, where past emotions resurface and impact your current relationship. Your enduring vulnerability to criticism causes an overreaction to constructive feedback from your partner.

Managing Triggers: Building Healthier Relationships

While triggers exist within all of us, understanding and addressing them can make a significant difference in our relationships. Here are some steps you can take to manage triggers effectively:

  1. Identify and Communicate: Take the time to identify your triggers and share them with your partner. This open communication helps both of you recognize when triggers are being activated, fostering understanding and empathy.
  2. Practice Self-Awareness: Develop self-awareness around your triggers and their impact on your emotions and behavior. Recognize when you’re experiencing a trigger and pause before responding impulsively.
  3. Seek Professional Support: Engaging in counselling or therapy provides an opportunity to work through triggers and their underlying issues. Professional counselors in Vancouver can guide you in developing healthier coping mechanisms and communication strategies.
  4. Couples Therapy: Consider couples therapy as a valuable resource for navigating triggers together. A skilled therapist can help you both understand and support each other’s triggers, leading to more productive conflict resolution.

Can Triggers be Eliminated Completely?

While it’s challenging to completely eliminate triggers, you can significantly reduce their impact on your present life. By acknowledging and addressing triggers through therapy, you can develop healthier responses and improve your relationship dynamics. The goal is to foster a more harmonious connection based on understanding, compassion, and effective communication.

Discover Expert Counselling in Vancouver

If you’re ready to strengthen your relationship by managing triggers effectively, our expert counsellors in Vancouver are here to help. Through compassionate guidance and evidence-based techniques, we provide the support you need to navigate triggers and cultivate a healthier, happier partnership.

Contact us to learn more about our counselling services in Vancouver. Take the first step towards building a resilient and fulfilling relationship today.

Remember, with professional support, you can overcome triggers and create a stronger bond with your partner.

Written by Erica Beauchamp